Aside from being a little under the weather this weekend, due to my internet provider being so fantastically naff I actually had to type this post up twice. Pfeh. :-x But you don’t want to know about any of that – let’s get on with the lushness of today’s four Assemblees, three of which you can play straight from your browser!

Mushroomer - ain't mush room in 'ere, har harMushroom Stew - slip-sliding away on the iceOh Crackers - Not Again! - fly, Lassie, fly...One pack - put that flab to some use

Mushroomer by Jotapeh TIGForum thread Play Mushroomer
Seeing the phrase “Just like a real video game!” immediately made me smile, but sadly the rest of the game couldn’t quite pull off enough to keep that smile on my face. A run and jump platformer made vaguely interesting with slidey controls and ninja rope goodness. Escape the cave before you lose all your lives or a ten minute timer expires. Competently done (nice backdrop!) and points for the rope, but a tad plain. 63%

Mushroom Stew by iarwain TIGForum thread Download Mushroom Stew for Windows Download Mushroom Stew for Intel Mac Download Mushroom Stew for Linux
Wahey, more mushrooms! You can never have enough mushrooms, folks. In this case you have to blast through a story of confusion and deception to find out why your mushroom buddies are suddenly trying to kill you. Use your crouching and time-bending skills to reach the end. Technically very good with several tricks used to enliven the graphics – sharp gameplay too, if a tad repetitive. Even has a level editor! 77%

Oh Crackers, Not Again! by The Greenest Banana TIGForum thread Play Oh Crackers, Not Again!
In a spicy, tangy twist to normality, here you have to protect a helpless little girl as she tries to get back home following a path which is infested with monsters. You take the part of her faithful and happily indestructible hound who can jump on enemies’ heads to stop them from being such a nuisance. A charming Flash effort but quite challenging even on the easiest difficulty. Needs more levels but still a great effort. 78%

One Pack by MrRoboman TIGForum thread Play One Pack
Being a toned ace space pilot is all very well but it’s oh-so-easy to pile on the pounds in your retirement. Such is the problem Ace Fatman now faces in his quest for… okay, I have no idea what his quest is, since this game is one for the “unfinished” pile. But it’s enough to raise a guffaw at the creative use of assets. Multi-purpose flab, anyone? Throw a can or three of polish at this and it could have an entertaining future! 52%